My fellow girlfriends, I want to go into something a little deeper this week.
Ask yourself, how often have you felt low, like you weren’t good enough? When have you decided not to speak out about something, post a photo on Instagram or wear something you loved because you didn’t feel confident enough?
For centuries, we as women have been told to be quiet, told to stay at home with the children, told we aren’t competent in the work place like men are and in modern days this has lead to a painful reality where incredible women walk the earth lacking in confidence.
I want this to change. I am a firm believer in the idea that every woman is worth more than what they believe and I so wish to see more incredible females chase their dreams without fear, and to support each other along the way!
So what can we do to help both ourselves and the wonderful women around us feel more confident, empowered and strong? Here is why I made a point of growing my own self confidence, and how you can too.
The importance of “You Do You”
I recently read one of the three amazing books by Sarah Knight which beautifully and hilariously illustrates how living a life that focuses on “you doing you” can allow you to be twenty times happier and able achieve everything you want in life. Who doesn’t want THAT? “you doing you” focuses on the idea of doing the things you love and not caring about what anyone thinks or says, which of course is a form of confidence. Imagine the things women could achieve if everyone just did what they wanted to do without worrying about what people thought?
You are ‘imperfectly perfect’
Learning to accept our flaws and be totally okay with them is key to growing self confidence. Too many beautiful women that surround me focus far too much on the things that they dislike about themselves, whether it’s a personality trait or a physical characteristic that irritates us, it is SO important to teach ourselves the ways of self acceptance so that we can be at peace with our flaws, and spend more time embracing what we love about ourselves.
Remember that nobody actually cares about the perfect body, or the perfect face. People care about kindness, honesty and positive vibes – those are the things that truly attract us to friendships and partners in the long run! Understand that you are imperfectly perfect and never apologise for who you are because there is nobody else quite like you.
Real women supporting real women creates true female empowerment
This one is HUGE. Too many are quick to tear down other women and I see it happening far too often! The worst part is actually the fact that it stems from insecurities and low self confidence, so you can see how this all comes full circle. By being vocal towards our fellow females and letting them know they are awesome, that the things they are achieving are amazing and that they are worthy of happiness and an amazing life, we are creating a better world where women are supported, and feel supported. Where there is support, there is confidence.
I make a real point of supporting all of the incredible bloggers and influencers that I follow, even if they’re doing something that I wish I was doing. It could be so easy to get jealous and try to pick a flaw out of them to make ourselves feel better, but I choose to support and love them every step of the way instead! It makes me feel fab and it means that I receive the same amount of love and support from them, which of course means that I feel ten times more confident and ready to dream big and achieve all of my goals! #GIRLBOSS!
Speaking of Girl Bossing, everyone loves a girl boss
By showcasing your own inner confidence, you will inspire other women to be confident too. Since starting my blog (which was absolutely terrifying, by the way), I have received an overwhelming amount of messages and emails from amazing women telling me that I was the person who inspired them to start a blog, even when they were scared about what their friends and family would think of them. By following my own dreams, I have shown others that it’s cool to follow their dreams too and that is something I am so incredibly proud of! By not caring about what people think and doing what you want to do, you show other women that it’s cool to do that too, and how awesome is that!
Confidence is a women’s sexiest trait, and we all want to feel sexy
RIGHT!? Confidence is the #1 most attractive trait and the best part is that anyone can have it! If you’re single, you will be a total babe magnet and if you’re in a relationship, your man will love you extra for it. Channel your inner Beyonce, girlfriend!
You’ll achieve more in life and open up so many doors of opportunity
Another huge one, I cannot stress the importance of constantly searching for the next opportunity, or meeting the next person who will help guide you to where you want to be in life! A lack of confidence sets people back and stops them from reaching their highest potential because they’re too scared of taking risks or going out of their comfort zone. You never know who you’re going to meet that could lead you through a door of opportunity such as the job of your dreams, a great mentor or even just a new friend! ALWAYS say yes to the things that scare you!
Feeling confident and empowered is actually FUN
It’s true! The feeling of being carefree is totally liberating, you will enjoy your life so much more if you stop worrying about what people think, focus on the things you love about yourself and the things that you want in life. It feels good! Go get em!
The best way to add some confidence into your everyday life..
A beautiful pair of shoes! Mi Piaci have released their Autumn Winter 2018 collection and it is absolutely gorgeous. From divine suede boots, to velvet block heels, to chunky platforms, there is truly a pair for everyone, no matter what your style or personality is like. Whether you love a pop of colour or like to keep it low-key with neutrals or black, each pair from “Elevate, Empower A/W 2018” will make you truly feel like the real superwoman you are. Representing the idea that strong women are cut from many different cloths, I love the diversity that this collection embodies, so I chose three pairs that made me feel confident, empowered, strong, and ready to take on anything that the world throws at me!
For everyday wear: Garland Ankle Boot
To power dress at events: Serene Mid Heel
To feel sexy and strong: Hayworth Ankle Boot
FOUR STRONG WOMEN WHO HAVE INSPIRED ME TO BE MY BEST AND FOLLOW MY DREAMS:
My beautiful Mumma, Cath Owens
My number one, always. Confidence pours out of my mum every single day and she has always been the one that encourages me to not give a crap about what other people think of me! I have grown up and watched her go through so much but she has never lacked confidence, empowerment and strength. She is the ultimate girl boss in my life and so much of my own success comes down to her influence and encouragement!
Victoria Magrath from In The Frow
When it comes to chasing my dreams, Victoria behind the blog ‘In The Frow’ is my go-to when I need some reassurance that my dreams are 100% valid and ready for me to chase! She is such a successful blogger and YouTuber but my favourite thing about her is that her success doesn’t just show in her numbers. Even if she is drowning in Fashion Month and travelling to a new city each week, she is consistent with her content because she cares about her followers. Seeing someone so successful who genuinely cares and loves their audience is SO inspiring to me! Plus even though she is constantly working like crazy to pursue her own dreams, she always has a smile on her face and something encouraging and positive to say in her vlogs, blog posts and Instagram posts. I absolutely adore her!
Whenever I feel like the social media world is getting a bit much for me, I turn to Matilda (well, her Instagram stories!). She is a total breath of fresh air for me and her nature always reminds me not to take myself or life too seriously in this industry. She is such a beautiful woman inside and out and I feel so lucky to know her!
I’m a long time admirer of Anne Frank after reading her diary when I was 13. Her famous quote “despite everything, I believe that people really are good at heart” always reminds me to be kind and positive towards others, no matter what I’m going through in life. If Anne can write that down in her diary during the time of holocaust, we can all be nicer and better people towards one another!
You are all such beautiful women inside and out and I want to encourage you all to start standing a little taller, refuse to apologise for who you are and to know that you are a total girl boss who deserves the absolute world! Work hard for the things you want, be supportive of the wonderful women that are around you and know your worth, because you are powerful.
Love, Ash xx