HOW TO COPE WITH TRANSITION PERIODS
I think.. being 21, I’m in a constant, gigantic transition period that starts at 18 and probably doesn’t end until I’m about 25. That’s the whole, “still a girl, not yet a woman” thing (thanks for reminding me, Britney Spears).
What I want to talk about today is not the long term, teenager caterpillar hanging in her hella-in-limbo chrysalis and waiting to transform into a beautiful, adult butterfly. I’m talking about the smaller transitional hurdles that smack us in the face when we sure as hell are not ready.
I just started my last university semester ever. It’s a spicy mixture of excitement and fear. I totally feel like I have the skills to go out into the world and make a killing in the career path that I’ve chosen, however, there’s no denying the fact of feeling like I’m not ready. Cue the violins!
During the last couple of weeks, I have been seriously considering what I am going to do with my life come October when I’m free as a bird and need to get myself into a position where I can pay off my troublesome student loan (these two words make my chest tighten up!). I have to be honest, it’s really been affecting me.
I’m dealing with teeth grinding on a nightly basis (major stress signal – if anyone has any tips to help me stop that would be most appreciated!), nightmares, and a consistent state of stress, just because I feel so worried about what’s to come in then next four months.
I’m getting closer to making a decision, and figuring out exactly what I need to do for both my career, my mental health and for my overall happiness. I thought it would be a good idea to share with you guys the ways I have been coping with these fear-of-the-unknown worries because from what I know, a lot of people go through this too!
- Be patient. Take time to ponder, never make decisions without sitting on them for at least a couple of days. Nothing good will come out of making an irrational decision and you could potentially throw yourself into a deeper hole than the one you already feel like you’re in!
- Focus on other areas of your life. There’s no point in putting all of your time and energy into an area of your life that just needs patience in order to come to a conclusion. Right now, I’m focusing on my blog which I love because I get to connect with you guys, show you things I’m loving right now and also hear your thoughts about them! Blogging and Instagram will always be my little creative and social outlet and brings me joy and security. So focus on something that makes you feel good!
- Accept what you can’t control, and take ownership of what you can control! Similar to what I mentioned above, however, we need to get ourselves into a mind frame of ‘whatever will be, will be’ not only in tough transition periods, but during all stages of life. We have to identify what we can and cannot control, learn to let go and to work on the things that we can be productive in! It’s a life changing philosophy, you guys.
- Find ways to relieve your stress. For me, this can be anything from neglecting my phone for an entire day and doing something fun with Liam, or taking an hour in the morning to have a coffee and catch up on all of my favourite bloggers and youtubers! Whether it be yoga, shopping, partying, a sleepover with your bestie, make time for it. It’ll save you.
- Talk to the people around you who care about you and have an outside perspective such as your partner, parents and closest besties. They know you inside and out and they can see what’s going on in your life a lot clearer than you can because they don’t share the stress and anxiety that you’ve got going on in your pretty little head. Keeping conversation open with the people who love you will not only help to make clearer decisions, but talking about your worries will make you feel a lot better, too!
- Write out pros and cons. THIS IS A LIFE SAVER! I sit down and do this every single time I’m faced with a life decision that needs to be made. I literally write out a list of pros, a list of cons and count how many sit on each side. You know the drill, if the cons outweigh the pros, your gut instinct is probably telling you not to do it anyway. If the opposite, go for it! You haven’t got as much to lose!
- Make a conscious effort to enjoy the stage of your life that you’re currently in. This can sometimes be difficult if you’re anything like me and you’re always one step ahead of yourself, but this is so seriously important. If you don’t enjoy the present, you’re never going to be happy or satisfied with your life. Make an effort to count your blessings on a daily basis. There is ALWAYS so many things to be happy about and grateful for!
I totally need to continue practicing what I preach here, but be kind to yourself, talk to your loved ones about the things that you’re going through or are worrying you, and trust the universe to take care of things. It knows best.
Photography: Sophie Isabella Milne